Crystal Ball

Crystal Ball

What does the New Year has in store for new music?

Written By

Colin Holter

By the time this column goes up, 2006 will be over and the new year will already be several days old. There’s a lot to say about what happened in the new music scene over the past 365 days, but instead I’d like to make a few predictions about 2007. Please feel free to append your own as you see fit.

  1. There will be a sudden proliferation of university laptop ensembles. Inspired by PLOrk‘s success, these groups will open up exciting new vistas for composition and improvisation. I foresee much squinting at broken patches; expect second-fiscal-quarter personnel resignations in the Cycling74 and MOTU customer service departments to skyrocket.
  2. At least one major American symphony orchestra will be repurposed, entirely forsaking standard rep in exchange for more lucrative fare. If the group plays any concerts without pop frontpeople, it’ll be film music. (This may coincide with the purchase of an orchestra by a major record label. I hear Diddy is in the market.) Opera companies, those bastions of integrity, will meanwhile remain fiercely committed to presenting really old music.
  3. Avian flu will continue to mutate and spread, natural disasters brought about by global warming will grow in frequency and potency, and higher scarcity of natural resources will cause greater economic stratification both within and between individual nations. Before long, the world’s population will dwindle to less than half its current size. The good news is that most of the survivors will be wealthy Americans and Europeans—in other words, populations that contain most of the planet’s new music fans. We’ll end up with a much greater market share.
  4. Elliott Carter will reveal that he is an immortal angel sent to walk the earth and guide the race of men with his eternal wisdom. However, he will announce as well that his time among us is almost over. Soon he will depart in a magnificent golden ship.
  5. Eager to draw a younger readership (18-to-25 year olds are so 2006), NewMusicBox will dismiss me in favor of an acned, beardless Juilliard prodigy. Site traffic will increase precipitously.