The Friday Informer: Blinded By Science

Remember oboist-turned-journalist Blair Tindall’s 2005 memoir Mozart in the Jungle: Sex, Drugs, and Classical Music? Salacious in title, if disappointingly tame in content (excepting the whole doing lines off Blairy’s toenail in the book’s opening chapter), this morning’s news brought word that Tindall is to wed Seattle’s lovable bow-tie-bedecked Bill Nye, “The Science Guy.” Hopefully Bill has read the book and knows exactly what he’s getting into.

But given that our favorite say-it-with-Hallmark holiday will be soon upon us, this love affair between science and music has got me thinking that perhaps we should do a few experiments of our own. So grab some graph paper, and let’s get started.

• One thing Tindall hits on in her book is how to pick a date based in the personality of the instrument he plays. Take this quiz to find out what kind of instrument you are.
• Now then, you’ll need something witty to discuss on the first date. You might compare the plight of modern healthcare to the staffing structure of the symphony orchestra. [via sounds and fury]
• Before you commit to your special someone, you might want to review the videogame collection under the T.V. Make sure the background music won’t drive you to re-enact Trouble in Tahiti in the living room. Think this is a laughing matter? This guy has dangerous looking charts.
• Ultimately, however, you’ll need to make sure everyone is clear that even up against birthdays and anniversaries, an orchestra conductor with an open slot in the program will always come first. It’s your duty for the good of the art form.
• Thinking of moving in together but the love of your life still doesn’t “get” new music? All is not lost. Misplace his CDs in the move so he’s forced to listen to yours and invite your wind quintet to practice at the house. Eventually, he can’t help but succumb to the social influence.
• Spurned by love? You might also consider making beautiful music with your computer network or with a glass tube full of snails.

So there you have it. If you get stuck on the path of music, science, and love, drop us a line. But if you have a question about technology, archives, preservation, or sound as they relate to music libraries, we seriously suggest you ask the experts instead.